What Do Four Founders, One VC, and Two Female Founders in a Bathtub Have in Common?

Let’s start at the beginning.

Late Saturday night, around 22:00, a troubling post appeared in my feed. The image showed three founders and a VC in an outdoor tub. The post, which was later deleted, read:

"When your VC asks you to join them in a hot tub…There’s only one thing to decide: Speedos or trunks?" 😆

The VC journey isn’t just about funding rounds and board meetings. It’s also about real relationships with people who believe in your vision.

At the end of the day, the best investors aren’t just backers. They’re partners. And sometimes… that partnership involves discussing strategy from a hot tub.

So, what did I choose? Speedos or trunks? 👀"

A cheeky late-night joke? Perhaps. But what followed was a wave of comments, many questioning the post’s tone and implications. Among them, Camilla Bergman, founder of The Loop, and I couldn’t help but ask: Do founders really need to entertain VCs like this to secure investment?

This isn’t an isolated incident; it reflects the ‘startup bro culture’—a culture that undermines diversity and makes it harder for female founders to access opportunities.

According to a 2022 report by Inklusiiv and VALIDEI, female founders in the Nordics receive significantly less venture capital than their male counterparts, with Sweden ranking among the lowest in Europe for gender-balanced investments (Inklusiiv, 2022).

Don’t misunderstand me—this is not about blaming this founder or investor. Rather, it highlights a broader issue within startup culture. They may not even realize the implications, which is why it’s crucial to address the systemic nature of the problem. To truly disrupt and improve a system, we must adopt a startup mindset—identifying the root causes and their consequences before designing solutions. The reality is that the startup bro culture negatively affects not just women but also men and other underrepresented groups in the ecosystem.

I’m not accusing these men of wrongdoing, but this is part of a larger problem. Everyone craves belonging, and in startup culture, bonding moments—whether in bathtubs, late-night drinking sessions, or other exclusive settings—create networks that systematically exclude women.

I’ve experienced it firsthand. I’ve seen “bros” act supportive when an investor or decision-maker is present, only to dismiss and patronize me later. I’ve been questioned, belittled, and undermined simply for expressing my opinion. And when female entrepreneurs speak up about these experiences, they are often labeled as ‘difficult’ or ‘entitled.’

Inclusion isn’t just a policy—it’s a choice. Not the government’s, not an incubator’s, but yours. It’s up to individuals to challenge toxic behaviors, foster equitable environments, and ensure that professionalism and merit define success—not backroom deals and social hierarchies.

Yes, founders and investors can be friends. But trading investment for access to an exclusive club is never a fair deal. Let’s stop normalizing these behaviors and start building a startup culture that includes everyone.

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References

Inklusiiv and VALIDEI (2022) DEI in the Nordic VC industry 2022 Report.

Available at: Inklusiiv.